Archive for May, 2006

Gender and Conversation

So while reading through blogs on MySpace (of all places), I read a summary about this old article written by Deborah Tannen, a linguistics professor at Georgetown, titled “Sex, Lies and Conversation; Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?“. And as much as I love generalizations about gender, I found the article pretty enlightening and funny to read.

It basically briefly discusses the way women talk with one another versus men, as well as the “talkative” factor of each person in different sitatuations. When women talk with other women it’s eye to eye, it’s supportive, it’s reassuring, and it’s the intimacy from the talking that acts like the friendship’s “cement”. Whereas relationships between men are more often characterized by the things they do together, their positions during conversation at angles from one another, and were found to dismiss each other’s problems. As such, combining these two tendencies can lead to a train wreck. I’ve never been a fan of paraphrasing when the original words do quite well on their own, so here’s an excerpt.

“You’re not listening”

But often when women tell men, “You aren’t listening,” and the men protest, “I am,” the men are right. The impression of not listening results from misalignments in the mechanics of conversation. The misalignment begins as soon as a man and a woman take physical positions. This became clear when I studied videotapes made by psychologist Bruce Dorval of children and adults talking to their same-sex best friends. I found that at every age, the girls and women faced each other directly, their eyes anchored on each other’s faces. At every age, the boys and men sat at angles to each other and looked elsewhere in the room, periodically glancing at each other. They were obviously attuned to each other, often mirroring each other’s movements. But the tendency of men to face away can give women the impression they aren’t listening even when they are. A young woman in college was frustrated: Whenever she told her boyfriend she wanted to talk to him, he would lie down on the floor, close his eyes, and put his arm over his face. This signaled to her, “He’s taking a nap.” But he insisted he was listening extra hard. Normally, he looks around the room, so he is easily distracted. Lying down and covering his eyes helped him concentrate on what she was saying.

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Happy Memorial Day

Poppies
Poppies, originally uploaded by Popo Moo Cow.

In Flanders Fields
By John McCrae

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly.
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

From Memorial Day Background

McCrae’s poem had a huge impact on two women, Anna E. Guerin of France and Georgia native Moina Michael. Both worked hard to initiate the sale of artificial poppies to help orphans and others left destitute by the war. By the time Guerin established the first sale in the U.S., in 1920 with the help of The American Legion, the poppy was well known in the allied countries — America, Britain, France, Canada, Australia and New Zealand — as the “Flower of Remembrance.” Proceeds from that first sale went to the American and French Children’s League…

Donations received in return for these artificial poppies have helped countless veterans and their widows, widowers and orphans over the years. The poppy itself continues to serve as a perpetual tribute to those who have given their lives for the nation’s freedom.

Omg Kittah

From Ryan :)

This is Norma

NormaFive months after volunteering at an orphanage in Nicaragua, I finally turned in the paperwork to sponsor one of the kids there. I ended up picking Norma–her running up and pulling my sunglasses off my head for the sake of a photo was memorable. I just received her informational packet today in the mail.

I’ve done something like this before, giving a couple bucks a month and receiving a few letters. Except this time around, it feels a bit different because I’ve played with the little girl in the photo and have stayed where she lives. Although I didn’t speak to her much while I was there except for the occasion described above, I recognized her on the list of orphans available for sponsorship. In any case, the packet recommends I start with a letter…in Spanish. It’s been a while since I’ve written, but I’m hoping my written Spanish is still better than my spoken one as it was in school. Should be fun.

Flickr’s New Look

I dig the Flickr‘s new look! I especially like how the photostream is now displayed in multiple columns and the links are grouped together in drop-downs. Admittedly, it’s something I’ll have to adjust to though. But I’ll gladly do so. (Am such a layout-nerd.)

View My Photostream.

Keep It TogetherCurrently Listening to:
Keep It Together
By Guster

The Super Long Much-Anticipated (I’m Sure) Update

So I haven’t been updating this with the same frequency that I used to. So to make up for it, here’s a high-level view of the last 60 days–in photos. (I mean, is there a better way?)

For St. Patrick’s Day I went out with the old roommates to Fremont. I can’t really remember when the four of us went out with just us, so it makes the list.

St. Patrick's Day '06
Me and Case at Red Door

Near the end of March Ryan and I went to San Francisco for the weekend. Although the weather wasn’t very cooperative with us, it was a pretty swell trip. I’ve been meaning to blog about it, but after Ryan blogged about it here, here, and here, I think he covered everything. ;) I like Frisco.

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